Filed under: marriage
It’s the June long weekend, and hubs and I are sneaking off down south for a little getaway. We’re going somewhere a bit different this time; more inland and in the forest, rather than on the coast like we usually do. I found this little cottage online which is on stilts, set into a hill, with sweeping valley views. It has an open fireplace and a spa on the balcony – can you imagine sitting in a steaming hot spa on a frosty night after a day’s bushwalking? I’ve bought some nice wines, some nice cheeses and cooked a couple of meals so all we have to do is laze around. I can’t wait. I even bought some chestnuts today to roast on the fire. Doesn’t that sound lovely and Dickensian? It is lovely bushy countryside around there, so we are hoping to get some good walks in. I’ll also be whoopin’ Hubs’ butt at Trivial Pursuit (he said, ‘I only want to take games that I win!’) but I’m the main packer around here. 
I may pop in the Scrabble, just for him.
We haven’t had a free weekend in many weeks, and fact have blown off several meetings and engagements this weekend, and boy does it feel good! This hasn’t been a month-o-bliss, so I’m looking forward to a splash of peace and happiness in what has been a difficult time.
Filed under: Uncategorized
We went to visit some friends last night (the curry night!) who have recently purchased their first home. They moved from a tiny little flat to this spacious, three-bedroom abode in a reasonable suburb. I was looking at the vast kitchen, spacious family area and meals area, that easily accomodated the 30+ people who were milling about. I was thinking how much I desire to have a more spacious home. I am really looking forward to owning our first home and having more than one tiny cupboard in the whole place. Our little rental only has one room that is light enough in winter to have no other light source than the window, and that is our bedroom. It is the only north-facing room in the whole house. I find myself gravitating to this room in the afternoons, to capture the northern light and drink tea and pray on my bed. I long, though, for a home where the main living areas are built to catch the winter sun and to have space to invite more than one or two couples.
I found myself dwelling, as I sometimes do, on what I don’t have rather than what I do. I found myself focusing on my desires for the future, rather than seeing the beauty in the here and now. I put a check to my thoughts, and pondered, instead, on the incredible gifts we do have. I saw myself sitting on the floor, legs crossed, and a pile of gifts on my lap, growing my the moment, poured out by a loving Father. I dwelt, in gratitude, on the fact that we have a roof over our head. I felt thankful for our sweet little home, which has so many nice features, despite the ones it lacks. I felt thankful for the quiet and serene neighbourhood we live in. I never feel unsafe. I thought of our lovely little backyard, soft and green in the late-autumn rain. I am thankful that we have money to supply all our needs, and many of our wants. I am beyond grateful for the many, many amazing friends the Father has given us, who give us so much love and so much support. They make our lives more beautiful. I am thankful that we always have enough food to eat, and I never have to worry about the next meal. I am blessed beyond measure.
In every day, I try to find beauty in the now. I try to delight in the sweetness of the moment; a rain-soaked rose, the smell of eucalyptus, the creamy richness of a home-made double-shot latte, the warmth of my husband’s hug, the joy of time together.
I’ve spent a lot of my life waiting and hoping for the next thing. I regret some of those moments. I think back to all those years of singleness, when I allowed my loneliness to crowd out the desire for Father to cultivate in me a deep, fierce, strong love for Him. I heard that ‘wait’ meant ‘no’. I mistrusted Him. I regret that. I know that some of the lessons He is teaching me now are ones that I probably should have learnt back then. He is hungry for our whole hearts. He is hungry for our trust in Him. He is hungry for us to seek first His kingdom and His righteousness rather than all the other things that crowd our lives.
My husband has felt the urgency for us to live in a different way from how we have been. It involves a bit more sacrifice, and possible a bit more waiting for the things I want. It involves the laying down of some of our goals and dreams. We both know, however, that we only get one shot as this life. We want it to be more about His kingdom than about having what we want when we want it. Letting go means trusing the He will be our sufficiency even in the midst of sacrifice. Don’t think that I am not being dragged to this kicking and screaming – I have definately had my moments of that. Sigh. I just know, in my heart, that grasping hold of some of these truths is going to result in lives well-lived.
Filed under: food
We’re going to our Bangladeshi friends’ house for dinner tonight, and I’m looking forward to an array of spicy curries. I love me a good, hot curry! I actually like it so hot that tears spring to my eyes and I break out into a light sweat. I hardly ever eat it that way, though, because my husband likes curry a bit milder than that. What I love about authentic Indian or South-East Asian food is the subtle differences in flavour that different types of curry have. You just don’t get that when you use a jar. When I’m feeling anal I ground up my own spices using the mortar and pestle – mustard seeds, coriander, cummin, cardamom – whatever the recipe requires. If you roast them first the flavour is incredible. Call me a food snob, I know it!
I love spicy Mexican food, too. I love it with cheese and sour cream. That probably isn’t authentic, but it tastes good! Thai curries are great, too.
I also love Japanese food. I like wasabi. I love that brain-freeze sensation when you have just a bit too much! (By the way, you can lessen that burn if you keep your mouth closed after putting it into your mouth. There is something about the air getting to it that makes it hotter. Apparently.)
Other weird tastes that I love include plain cheddar cheese with tomato ketchup on it. I often have this as a quick snack after school. Yum! I know. Weird. I think this stems from my childhood when mum and dad were going out to a dinner party, and she just wanted to throw together a quick meal for us. She would boil spaghetti, grate cheese over it, and splotch on a good wodge of ketchup. She was the kind of mother who made fresh tuna and salad sandwiches for our school lunch, or some other lovely combination, and we would beg for ketchup and cheese. Weird kids.
Other food love affairs for me include pecan pies, chocolate cake and plain chocolate. I can’t stand lemon flavoured puddings, like tart or pie. Blech. I can’t eat meringues (how DO you spell that word??) or cheesecake. Way too rich or something. I love anything that is almond flavoured. I drool over an almond croissant.
I love fresh salad. I’ve got to eat a salad at least three times a week. Our favourite one at present is with mixed leaves, sprouts, feta, tomato, spanish onion, garlic, semi-sundried tomatoes and something else crunchy, like snow-peas. We have this with a fresh vinegrette.
We probably stink all the time, because we both love garlic. I can eat it raw, chopped finely over a salad. I often roast whole cloves, and squeeze them over vegetables or mix into mashed potato.
I love a really good cup of coffee, or a lovely cup of tea, made with leaves, not bags.
What else? I love olives, but hubs hates them. He doesn’t like mustard, but eats it often (he doesn’t know about this). Same goes for anchovies.
What foods do you love or loathe? I’ll ask this of any readers who are still hanging around!
(I’m off for a bit of cheese and tomato sauce.)
Filed under: marriage
A couple of nights before my Beloved went away, I had to pay a late-night visit to, you know, that place. Anyway, it was pretty dark, and I didn’t have my contacts in, but squinting in the dark, I thought the toilet looked a bit different. I ignored this thought, musing to myself how blessed I am to have a man who never leaves the seat up. He is so considerate! I was thinking to myself. So many men would forget sometimes.
It was at that moment that the loo suddenly seemed a long way down, and awfully, awfully cold, and oh! I nearly took a dive!
Yep. He had forgotten for the very first time. Thank the Lord for strong leg muscles and quick reflexes.
Really, it’s pathetic, because there are many, many women who have to live without their hubands for weeks on end. I am still finding it hard, though. When your lives are so enmeshed it really affects so much of what one does every day. Actually, I am moving from the missing him desperately to the ‘Hey! I can turn the light off whenever I want!’, stage, so that is good. It helps that work has been frenetic, with a twelve hour day yesterday, and that I have something on tonight and tomorrow night (chocolate fondue night! Husband? What husband?).
In regards to work, I have to question why the student who was arrested the day before yesterday for inciting gang violence and being with a group of kids (outside school) who all had knives or machetes is still allowed to be a part of my class? The disclaimer is that although he was in school uniform, he was outside the school grounds, so, you know, this is not a school issue. Give me a break. He spent eight hours in jail, but of course, it is all the police’s fault. We can’t accept any responsibility, oh no.
What I find with refugees who have been through severe trauma is that they can go one of two ways in their new country. Most come here eternally grateful, and jump at every opportunity to build an amazing future for themselves. The other hold onto suspicion and anger (and I do totally get this) and end up in all kinds of trouble because they live like the world owes them something. While I have every sympathy (and believe me, I bend over backwards to build into these kids) it is after events like this, which follow other events of a similar nature, that grace starts to run out and I think justice should prevail. I actually really like this kid; he is bright and smart and funny, but is inordinately arrogant, lazy and has a serious temper problem. He has had chance after chance and now it seems to me that the time has come for a reality check.
Harumph. I don’t usually write about work in this much detail. You have no idea how much goes on in my day, but I try to keep my mouth shut out of a desire to protect the kids in my care. Maybe I should delete this later?
We had our parent/teacher evening last night, and as always, I am humbled by the stories that would break me if they had happened to me. It is inspiring to see the courage and perseverance under the most dire of circumstances, and the hope that shines in spite of life dealing the most cruel blows.
There was the gorgeous, graceful African mother who left three of her children at home alone, bringing her (scrumptious!) two year old and her daughter to speak to her teachers. She travelled on the bus, a good two hours journey, had to wait nearly two hours because the interpreter was late, then was prepared to catch the bus home again. I’m so glad we were able to send her off in a taxi.
Then there was the aunt who adopted her nephew’s children from Burma (oh, the plight of the Burmese) and was ‘prepared to spend all my money on them, because I have no husband and children of my own’, and ‘could you tell me how to enrol them into sporting clubs so they can have every opportunity to build life in their new country?’ Hats off to these amazing people.
I really need to do some serious work on my ‘other job’ now, the Cambodia one. Hopefully this has put me into a writing frame of mind!
- Ahem. It’s my birthday today, and it has been superb! My awesome, handsome, clever husband threw me a BIG suprise party yesterday and I did not have a clue. This is monumental, people. It is Very Hard To Sneak Past Me. He pulled together (with a lot of help from his lovely, hard-working sister) an awesome group of people; current church friends, my old uni friends, work colleagues – I am seriously impressed! He snuck my mobile phone and copied a pile of numbers. I am blessed with such an awesome man, seriously.
- In sad news, I heard about the death of a dear friend of mine from university days. I have thought of her often, of late, and have been meaning to get in touch.
Too late, now. She died fairly suddenly of aggressive bowel cancer, leaving behind her husband and two little boys. It has made me contemplate the transient nature of life, and what I think I would look back upon and value/regret. It is more about people than activities. It is more about His kingdom than a cause. It is about each precious moment, not the big picture. It is more about today than tomorrow. I will miss you, Sue. - School has been very, very challenging. Why do things never come easy for me?
- My parents left for France on Monday. This time, they will be gone for two months. We will miss them; they are friends, as well as parents.
- Lastly, my husband is off to Cambodia for the week tomorrow. We have to get up at 4.30am to take him to the airport. I feel oddly bereft, and I have had this sad feeling in the pit of my stomach all day. I am so sappy! He is going with our pastor, and they will be training the leaders and pastors in our church there. I am simultaneously so pleased and proud that is he going and missing him like crazy already. What do people DO when their husbands are away?? I think I will miss most the little things we do each day; our afternoon walks and talks, the silly, crazy fun we have, and those long chats in the dark before sleep. I will miss his constant cuddles. (Valerie, it is Only For A Week. Get a grip.)
